sex dreams

page updated: 31-Mar-2004

I can think of two kinds of sex dreams that I have.

The first is the usual kind, where sometimes when I am asleep and dreaming the dream is sexy or I have sex with someone. Everyone I have ever talked to about this has dreamt about sex, and no one I have ever talked to has ostracized me in any way for having or not having sex dreams. When I was in junior high, I was once describing a romantic dream and felt the need to give a "but I didn't dream that I had sex with him" disclaimer, and my friend immediately replied, "Don't worry; I have sex in my dreams all the time. One time I had sex with Jesus." This made me feel very secure.

I myself can't ever remember having dream sex with an iconic being, but there has been a fair cast of characters, covering the full rainbow of gender, personality, imaginariness, and real-life relationship. I'm not really sure whether this dream lover is most often someone I am actually attracted to, or whether it is equally likely to be a random aquaintance or a fully made-up person.

I can't remember ever having felt strange the morning after having a smutty dream about someone who was technically inappropriate, like my neighbour or the postman or my mom or whatever. I don't feel dirty or take responsibility for my dreams. I don't think I control them; I think they just happen. Also, I don't think the gender of the dream lover is really a result of what gender I am attracted to. I do find though that sometimes a sexy dream involving a particular concept like lesbians or being half dressed will make me desirous of things of that nature for a day or two.

For the sake of completeness, some notable dream people I can remember having smutty dreams about: an imaginary black disco vixen in an orange halter-suit; my father, who had a fat, manly but hairless vulva in the dream; my special boy; an imaginary ski instructor with freckles and black hair; a friend of mine in a reptilian incarnation (very focussed on her imaginary round, smooth reptile belly which was both snake-ish and furred); my special boy and other imaginary people at the same time; an imaginary woman who had an oyster instead of a vulva, which was pearlescent, mostly white with dark pink accents, and very tidy and plastic-looking; etc etc...

I don't know anything of dream interpretation, and have never been terribly curious about what my smutty dreams have to say about me (in real life I don't have a fetish for reptiles, although I do like my belly).

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